Date, Marry, or Kill?

Okay, I think most of us have played some variation of this game before, and I figured it was about time we did a PubCrawl version of it. 🙂 For those who don’t know how this game goes, our version is as follows: pick out a fictional (book) character that you would like to marry, then one you’d just like to date, and then one you’d love to kill. Here’s what we think

S. Jae-Jones (JJ)

JJDate: DR. PELLINORE WARTHROP FROM THE MONSTRUMOLOGIST. OMG. I LOVE HIM. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. I love his failed poet, romantic heart, his crazy-intense focus, his mad scientist-ness, his weird, almost Asperger’s-like way of being unable to understand most social conventions. (Also, I imagine he looks like Crazy David Tennant.)

Also, I’d like to put in a vote for dating FEE WORTHINGTON from Libba Bray’s Gemma Doyle books, because I love her. I LOVE HER SO MUCH.

Marry: Gilbert Blythe from Anne of Green Gables. He’s sweet, he’s funny, he’s charming, and he’s totally a best friend and partner—ideal qualities for a marriage, I think.

Kill: I’m a lover, not a killer. 😉

Rachel Seigel

RachelI’m not sure about “date” or “kill”, but I’d totally marry Augustus from The Fault in Our Stars. He’s intelligent, literate, and so amazing!

Erin Bowman

Erin BowmanCan I do this with all Harry Potter references? I think so…

Date: One of the Weasley twins. Funny, sweet, spontaneous. It would be a blast. For a little while…

Marry: Sirius Black. Loyal, courageous, passionate, and as faithful as they come. If only he hadn’t been framed for his best friend’s murder…

Kill: Gilderoy Lockhart. Pompous, vain, conceited, and self-centered. Blegh. He is just horrid and the wizarding world would be better without him. (Oh, and if I have a freebie, I’d take care of Umbridge, too.)

Jodi Meadows

Jodi MeadowsDate: Howl from Howl’s Moving Castle (Diana Wynn Jones). He’s sooo cute and funny, but we couldn’t be together forever. Or even a month. He’s too vain and self-centered. And furthermore, I wouldn’t clean up the slime when he pouts. Adore him, though.

Marry: Jack from Everneath (Brodi Ashton), because who doesn’t want that kind of love and dedication?

Kill: I dunno. Mean boys and mean girls.

Amie Kaufman

amie165c-twitterDate: Tristan Thorn, from Neil Gaiman’s Stardust. I never could resist a grand gesture, and he’s got those covered. It might get a bit tricky over the long term, though.

Marry: Sam Henry, from Miranda Kenneally’s catching Jordan, because he’s d-r-e-a-m-y, and you should read the book to find out why!

Kill: Roger of Conte, from Tamora Pierce’s Tortall series (not that it hasn’t been tried), because it would save everybody a lot of trouble. Although there would probably be less story.

Biljana Likic

Biljana picDate: Howl, from Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones. How can you NOT be head over heels by the end of that book? He’s so frustratingly charming and tortured and stubborn!! I adore him! But I don’t know how long his fancy with me would last, so date it is!

Marry: Shadow, from American Gods by Neil Gaiman. Oh my god that man. I want that man to be real. Intelligent, strong both physically and emotionally, charming as hell, not judgmental, does the right thing out of innate nobility, is just an all-around real man…sigh…

Kill: Parlabane from The Rebel Angels by Robertson Davies is just…ugh truly despicable.

Leigh Bardugo

Leigh BardugoI know my Bed/Shag/Shtup option is Lymond from Dorothy Dunnett’s Lymond Chronicles. But I have no idea who I would marry or kill. Nice to know my priorities are in order 😉

Julie Eshbaugh

Julie Eshbaugh picDate: Darcy from Pride & Prejudice… I’m pretty sure this one requires no explanation.

Marry: Heathcliff from Withering Heights… I’m certain this one DOES require explanation, since he’s pretty detestable. But here’s my thought process: if I had been Cathy, I would have married Heathcliff instead of Linton, and he never would have become the demon he becomes later in the book. Instead, he would have devoted himself to making me (um, Cathy, that is,) the happiest woman in the world.

Kill: Heathcliff from Withering Heights… Because I’m not Cathy, so I’m not able to marry Heathcliff instead of Linton and prevent Heathcliff from becoming the deplorable, vengeful man he becomes. So I guess I’d have to kill him instead. 😉

Vanessa diGregorio

vanessa-di-gregorioDate: Vidanric Renelaeus, aka the Marquis of Shevraeth from Crown Duel. He makes anonymous courtship via letters so sexy! Plus, behind that drawling bored act he puts on, he’s smart and thoughtful and sweet.

Marry: Definitely George Cooper from The Song of the Lioness quartet! What a Rogue! And he’s loyal, a little dangerous, and very cunning. I’d never make him wait 8 years for me!

Kill: Leck from the Graveling series. He is, without a doubt, one of the most twisted and horrifying villains ever.

Susan Dennard

Susan DennardDate: I had to think about this since EVERYONE ELSE stole my answers. I’ve settled on Fox from Sherwood Smith’s Inda series. He’s so dark and angry, but all good and soft underneath.

Marry: While Fox would be fun to date (and maybe kiss ;)), I think I need someone steadier for marriage—like Gen from The Thief (especially in The King of Attolia—mmmmm!) because he’s clever, agile, and all around sexy without being overtly hot.

Kill: Aary from Catch-22. Obscure reference, I know, but to this day, he remains one of those characters I hate. Hate, hate, HATE because he’s wicked with no remorse (because he has no ability to ever see himself as having made a mistake)…and there are actually people like him in the world.

Marie Lu

Marie SquareDate: Adam (from If I Stay and Where She Went, by Gayle Forman). Uh, because he’s a rock star, and hot as hell, and sweet. I don’t think it’d work out in the long run, though. Too much of a celebrity. 🙂

Marry: Wade Watts (from Ready Player One, by Ernest Cline). He’s just endearing and adorable and smart, and a gamer.

And now, folks, of course we want to know…Date, Marry, or Kill?

                                

22 Responses to Date, Marry, or Kill?

  1. Katherine S Jun 8 2012 at 9:10 am #

    I would “date” Mr. Darcy from PRIDE & PREJUDICE, he’s so sweet. I would definitely marry Shane from Morganville Vampires by Rachel Caine. He’s sexy, dangerous, strong, sincere and just all around lovable.

    • Marie Lu
      Marie Lu Jun 8 2012 at 12:43 pm #

      Ah, our dear Mr. Darcy! <3 He is most definitely dateable. 😉

  2. Susan Jun 8 2012 at 11:03 am #

    eeeeeee GILBERT BLYTHE is forever and ever my favorite fictional man. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that if I had to be one fictional character for the rest of my life, I’d always pick Anne Shirley.

    Although I think Owen from Just Listen by Sarah Dessen is a close second, so I guess I’ll go with dating him. 🙂 And I rather like Erin’s suggestion of taking care of Umbridge. Awful, awful woman.

    • Marie Lu
      Marie Lu Jun 8 2012 at 12:45 pm #

      I’d like to give Umbridge a piece of my mind too! (I….haven’t read Anne Of Green Gables. *ducks tomatoes* But I hear WAY too many great things about Gilbert Blythe and I really must get to it one of these days!)

  3. Megan Duff Jun 8 2012 at 11:57 am #

    Date: Augustus Waters from The Fault in Our Stars. I love him I really do. We would have so much fun together! However…I think his existential crises would come to annoy me. Unless I was Hazel I caouldn’t handle him for long.

    Marry: Cricket from Lola and the Boy Next Door. The hair, the rubber bands, the short pants, the shoes, the energy…sigh. I love, Love, LOVE him. He would be the sweetest husband ever. He could also give me a planetarium the size of a pocket watch. PLUS

    Kill: LECK. Definetly LECK. I agree a 1000% with Vanessa. He is the most evil and heinous person in literature (for now anyway). The prologue to Fire? Evil manipulative baby Leck makes my skin crawl. The discoveries in Bitterblue? I gagged. For real.

    • Marie Lu
      Marie Lu Jun 8 2012 at 12:51 pm #

      Cricket!! <3 And God, LECK IS SO KILL-WORTHY. One of the creepiest villains I've ever come across in books. Funny story: while on the way to a Penguin event at BEA, I was sitting next to Kristin Cashore but had NO idea it was her. We were both politely introducing ourselves as Marie and Kristin, and then I was like, "So what is your book?" And she's like, "I write fantasy, my books are called Graceling, Fire, and–"

      And I *flipped out*. "YOU'RE KRISTIN CASHORE?!" At least I made her laugh. 🙂

      • Megan Duff Jun 8 2012 at 12:56 pm #

        HAHA you met Kristin Cashore??? So jealous!

        I love how authors get to fangirl over each other. When its mutual its so cute ;D I’m sure she was like “Oh my God! Marie Lu? Author of Legend? I love you too!”

    • Vanessa Di Gregorio
      Vanessa Di Gregorio Jun 18 2012 at 7:16 pm #

      Baby Leck is HORRIBLE!!!!!!!!!! Ugh! (Why’d you have to remind me??????)

  4. Myra Jun 8 2012 at 1:26 pm #

    I’m going to second Fee Worthington. <333

    Also, ditto killing Leck. I despise him.

  5. Anna Jun 8 2012 at 2:51 pm #

    I agree with Erin, I’d definitely marry Sirius!

  6. Lauren Jun 8 2012 at 4:23 pm #

    Ooohh, I’d date Adam from IF I STAY/WHERE SHE WENT too. That’s exactly who I was thinking of while reading this entire post. I’d marry Cricket from LOLA AND THE BOY NEXT DOOR….and kill? Um. Voldemort? Yeah. Voldemort.

  7. Renate Jun 9 2012 at 6:20 pm #

    Date: Probably Vidanric as well – who doesn’t love a great courtship via correspondance? *swoon*
    Marry: I do love Gilbert Blythe, and I would love to be Anne, but I think it’s a toss-up between Char from Ella Enchanted and Nat from The Witch of Blackbird Pond – I love them both so much!
    Kill: So many villains, so little time…

  8. Whitney Jun 10 2012 at 2:21 am #

    Date: Definitely Jacob from NORTH OF BEAUTIFUL. 🙂 He is supportive, original, a great listener, and able to see past a birthmark that made the heroine of the story feel ugly. He saw her inner beauty and introduced her to geocaching — who wouldn’t love someone who could introduce them to real life treasure hunting around the world?

    Marry: Cathal from HEIR TO SEVENWATERS because he is absolutely amazing. Lord, Clodgah is one lucky lady. 🙂 He’s the type of man that jumps off a cliff and onto a flimsy branch without a second thought, just because his lady is in trouble. He joins an adventure just because she needs his help, is loyal, determined, a warrior but kind, vulnerable, and willing to sacrifice his entire world for his love. *swoon* Definitely my biggest literary crush.

    Kill: Hmmm…well, I’d really like to maim Herbert Barret from SUCH A PRETTY FACE, but killing seems to be a bit too much for him. He needs to be beat down and forced to realize how horrible he’s been to his wife, his two children, and the niece he took in when she was young. The things he did to them (emotionally) is so horrifying and damaged them all. But I don’t think he should be killed for that, mostly because he’s a character in this reality (for some reason death only seems right in fantasy realities…no idea why). So I’m certainly another one for the murder of Leck. In GRACELING when she killed him I had thought he was evil and was glad to see him go, but after reading FIRE and BITTERBLUE I am absolutely horrified by that character. It nearly makes me wish she had tortured him a bit before ending him (although I realize that there hadn’t been time and what she did was pretty amazing for Po anyway).

    • Whitney Jun 10 2012 at 2:22 am #

      Um…I feel like I should mention that my response has SPOILERS. Yeah…wow, I wrote a lot…

  9. Debbie Jun 10 2012 at 2:21 pm #

    Biljana, Shadow is a great one to marry. And he’s so understated I’d never have thought of him myself. Although now I’m wondering whether I could bear to date Wednesday. Just once, just to see …then I’d probably have to kill him.

  10. Stephanie Allen Jun 10 2012 at 10:06 pm #

    Date: Finnick Odair from The Hunger Games, even if I would never pay attention to a single word he said.

    Marry: Vidanric, YESSSSS. I’m SO GLAD someone else mentioned him, because that man is FINE. (Plus, I have a feeling he is one of the only people who could possibly match my snarkiness, which automatically makes him The One.)

    Kill: Theon Greyjoy, but only after punching him repeatedly in the face.

    • Vanessa Di Gregorio
      Vanessa Di Gregorio Jun 18 2012 at 7:13 pm #

      Hahahaha! I simultaneously love and hate how many fellow Vidanric fans there are, ahaha! On the one hand, he is totally amazing and dreamy and snarky and mysterious and wonderful and DESERVES hordes of women falling at his feet! On the other hand… it means I’ve got a lot of competition (Meliara being #1, of course! lol)

  11. A. Barone Jun 12 2012 at 3:18 pm #

    Hmm… this is a fun game to play.

    Date: Edward Cullen or Rhett Butler. Edward because flying through the woods sounds so romantic, and Rhett because well as a loveable rogue he’s bound to take me to all sorts of fun places.

    Marry: Gilbert Blythe or George Cooper or Mr. Darcy. Gilbert because he’s just so loveable (and like Susan said if there was one fictional character that I would like to be it’s Anne). George Cooper because he’s just amazing and totally one of my favourite characters in the Song of the Lioness quartet and Mr. Darcy because well just because he’s Mr. Darcy I guess.

    Kill: I’m really not a violent person but the one fictional character that I would like to kill is Umbridge. She annoys me SO much.

  12. Susan Jun 12 2012 at 9:56 pm #

    Is it too late to play?

    Date: Fermin Romero de Torres from Ruiz Zafon’s The Shadow of the Wind. I love that character. He would be so fun. Okay so maybe he isn’t externally beautiful. But his intelligence and humanity and love for life would be amazing to discover. Plus he is curious and inventive. I love the way he talks. A perfect combination for a lover.

    Marry: Barney Snaith from The Blue Castle by L. M. Montgomery. He wouldn’t be opposed to marrying an old maid like me. And to top it all off…he’s a writer. He lives his life the right way. Great husband material.

    Kill: Richard Katz from Franzen’s Freedom. What a pain in the … Actually you could kill every character in Freedom except for Joey. I kind of liked Joey a little bit. I think he is capable of love unlike the others. But I’d kill Richard first. And I’d use one of his guitar strings to do the deed.

    • Vanessa Di Gregorio
      Vanessa Di Gregorio Jun 18 2012 at 7:14 pm #

      It’s NEVER too late to play! 😀

      And also, I totally died of laughter at your Kill! :p

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